Frank Welt

Frank Welt is the owner of the lumberyard in Burnt Culvert, Oklahoma, exactly two miles down the road from Rolling Greens Deluxe Mobile Home Park. His sole appearance to date is in Leven Thumps and the Gateway to Foo.

Personality
Frank Welt is considered a good, albeit down-to-earth character. He reprimands Terry's selfish actions, but when asked for help by a chunk of wood, Frank declares he needs a drink. His physical description is never given.

Character History
Leven Thumps and the Gateway to Foo

When Terry Graph came by offering to sell what was left of Geth (as a fantrum tree), Frank had no interest whatsoever in buying the green wood. However, when Terry explained his asking price was a mere twenty dollars, Frank, pitying him, bought the load of wood. He then proceeded to sort out the usable pieces from the scrap. Geth's heart attempted to enlist Frank's help by repeatedly calling out to him until his voice failed. Unnerved by the voice that seemingly came from nowhere, Frank decided that he must be hearing things and further examined Geth's now silent heart.

As he discovers the piece of wood is soft and seems to breathe, a driver from Tatum Inc. arrives to pick up the wood. Frank proceeds to toss Geth's heart into the Tatum truck, glad for it to be someone else's problem, and retires into his shop to draw up the forms for the driver to sign.

Leven Thumps and the Ruins of Alder 

During the Dearth's attempt to conquer Reality, it is presumed that Frank was overcome by the creature and dragged into the soil. Upon the Dearth's destruction, he was likely released with no memory of those events.

 Quotes by Frank:

"Lousy drunk. Destroy a beautiful tree so that you can wet your tongue. Pathetic."

-Frank Welt on Terry Graph